Sorry it has been so long!

Hello lovely ladies and gents of the blogosphere,

I must begin by apologizing for my delay in posting, it is not because I don't love you dearly!

After already passing through four of my travel destinations in India I am already behind in my updates - but I finally have the chance to sit down and write to you with an internet connection fast enough to load this page.

In fact, I am writing from the most luxurious hotel yet, it even has wifi.

So, I hope you're all doing as well as I am and are ready for a long winded recount of my journey thus far, I hope it is legible enough as I am writing this from my phone so I might break it up into a couple of posts.

GOLD COAST - The golden strip of armed hold-ups.

My trip to India began with an early morning Air Asia flight from the Gold Coast, where we stayed the night before.

Thankfully, we woke up for the 7am flight after an unfortunate glitch where none our three alarms set went off.

I kid you not, it was exactly like the Seinfeld episode where the olympic runner misses the race because he didn't set the hotel alarm properly.

"It was the AM, PM..."

Yes, yes, it was and also some bad luck!

After a mad rush to the airport, the flight seemed like a walk in the park and in 8 short hours we arrived in hot, humid, sticky Kuala Lumpur.

With Tom practicing his "tareee-maharree kas-say" (thank you in Malaysian) over and over in the taxi, we were off to our airport hotel for the evening, in what was to be the first of many hair-raising car journeys.

After a restful night sleep and a breakfast at a buffet more than 8 times the size of our apartment, we were all smiles, tareema kassey and tips for the waiters - little did we know the hotel would end up charging us twice for the room and I would leave half my toiletries behind - say hello to two months without a nail brush, soap and shampoo that actually washes western curly hair!

So, filled with breakfast delights, our coats were shiny, our socks were clean and we were on our way to Kolkata.

KOLKATA - A city of extremes.

To say I didn't arrive, I landed in Kolkata would an understatement.

My introduction to what is renowned as one of India's poorest cities was typically Indian and the car trip from the airport was typically heart breaking.

After a delayed flight from KL, the sight of Kokata's city lights below the plane was a sight for sore eyes, but in a heart stopping diversion at what seemed like five meters before we hit the runway, the plane jolted back up into the sky.

We were forced to wait for what seemed like the longest 10 minuets of my life, to find out whether we had lost an engine on dissent, (which the seat safety guide reassuringly notes, is not a big deal) the captain came over a crackly speaker "um, ah, ello lady and gentle, we have been forced to reject our landing due to animal blocking the runway".

Welcome to Kolkata.

After circling the airport for half an hour we went in for our second dive and as we touched down I prayed to Ganesha I didn't see a cow flying past my window.

Thankfully, no casualties.

I don't think Kolkata airport has had a redecoration since about 1978.

Red velvet and wooden framed mirrors galore.

Also, apparently, there is no need to security check anything at Kolkata airport - bags, people, cows?

Just come on through.

And, on average, 6 people are required to do one job.

As we walked through the exit, we were accosted by very few people, which I was very surprised by.

I had expected to see a sea of hungry children and taxi drivers.

However, I was still pretty happy to see someone holding a piece of paper with "Mr Utting" on it.

We piled into the back of an old navy blue Ambassador and drove to our hotel, turing off the motor to conserve fuel at even the slightest hint of a traffic jam.

That is what I will remember most from Kolkata, the squeal and shudder of all the Ambassador taxis turning on one-by-one as the traffic light changed to green.

Hotel Broadway was like an old colonial boarding house with big hallways and high cellings, it felt like a haven from some kind of impending war, or maybe a really high-class brothel where naked women would be packing heroin.

It also had the feeing of a place where revolutionaries planned their next move, or where poets wrote emotive literature.

For us, ex-brothel or not, it was an $8 per night place to sleep, with a clean bathroom and running water.

I can describe Kolkata in a few words; chaotic, organized, relentless and *beep* LOUD!

My god, was it loud, they say New York is the city that never sleeps, but I think Kolkata comes pretty close.

The traffic seemed to stop only between 3 and 4 every morning and then resumed almost like clockwork at 4:01 with an almighty choir of beeps and screeches

The city itself did not seem threating to me at all.

The more pressing issue was crossing the roads.

Unlike other cities i've visited, Kolkata traffic is an unforgiving a wall of yellow cabs, peppered with pushbikes, rickshaws and motorcycles that waits for no one.

And, because Tom was unwell for the first few days, it was a day to day challenge I had to face, alone.

With some advanced frogger skills and sly trailing of local men, I was crossing roads ... like a boss.

However, having no sense of direction (at all) I found Kolkata VERY confusing and was faced with impending death from road crossing probably more than necessary

The first few days in India were spent trying to organize a mobile phone (which every person who sees my 'le phone' laughs snidely because it is such a cheap piece of shit) and eating at the hotel restaurant because it seemed almost impossible to find anywhere else to eat.

Our daily meals were quite a comical affair as the hotel restaurant seemed to double as the hottest bar in Kolkata by night.

Being one of the only women, let alone western woman I had seen after a week in Kolkata, it was quite the show for the locals when I went down for quiet ale and dahl.

I have found the stares from Indian men really quite funny, because their interest is so obvious.

I have not felt uneasy about the attention at all (maybe because I this is my second time in India), in fact, for the most part, I understand it is purely interest in the different, rather anything sinister or sexual.

After a week in Kolkata, it was time to move on (i'll give you Kolkata-Varanasi train journey post later).

My experience of Kolkata was that of a city that seems to ring you out with its relentless nature, but at the same time makes you want to come back.

It was so difficult to do anything and even the smallest thing took hours, but at the same time, the city has really special quality of old India that I wont forget.

What was so clear to me, was the clash of this old India wrestling with the new.

The new wrestles for signage space, car space, store space, any space to develop a modern Kolkata.

The city is expanding, but it is clear the gap between the middle class and the poor working class is still very large, like elsewhere in India.

There are children being forced into prostitution in Kolkata's red light district, while wealthy Indians order paneer tika masala bugers for breakfast at Park Street Macdonalds in the center of the city.

The psychology of the city seems like it is still 30 years behind the rest of the world, but as the old colonial buildings make room for the neon KFC sign out the front, I hope Kolkata will not leave behind too many casualties as it is thrust into the 21st century.

That's all from Kolkata.

I will post more, tomorrow.

I'm getting sleepy and I need to enjoy my clean sheets before my train journey to Jaipur tomorrow.

Love, as always,

over and out,

Al

Xx